Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Blood drinking by Amy Mah Teenage Vampire

Vampire fangs, biting and blood drinking by Amy Mah Teenage Vampire

No. 1 in understanding vampires THE FANGS

Being a blood sucking denizen of the night is not always that easy, like how the heck do you obtain your midnight snack.

So let’s look at some of the old ideas, yes this idea is reported in some books by authors that could look to read a few medical books first

1.    Sucking blood through the skin or pores of the victim er? Like how does that work? Now I am no doctor but you must need lungs like a hydraulic pump to make that sort of trick work.

The nearest thing I have tried to this is cupping which is painful and if anyone says it does not is lying!

This is what you look like after a nice calming Cupping session or rather in my case screams of pain followed by get those fringing things off me, before I bite you!!!!!

Yes you may go nice and red but leaking blood?  

Sucking blood through pores in the skin is like mega hard work and for a blood sucker they would die of starvation from the energy expended to rip flesh off by suction

The skin is pulled up and is red but no blood, so sucking through the skin is not something I would try. 

2.    Next is biting with normal teeth …………. Right ok, this sounds possible ………. Ok if you are 3 years old then maybe but as a way to drink blood? Are you kidding?

Lots of talk of this in the early vampire myth but come on normal teeth?

This is a dark lord of the night we are talking about not some flea-bitten werewolf or moronic zombie!

For Liliths sake use a frigging knife if all you own is a set of burger choppers. …….. Like get real what a dumb way of getting a drink.

Biting into raw flesh with normal teeth causes more problems if all you want is to drink blood ..................

If you only have normal teeth use Tools!!:

Humans have used tools for yonks

Doctoral student Kyle Brown, who led the research at the University of Cape Town in South Africa, said: ''Our illumination of the heat treatment process shows that these early modern humans commanded fire in a nuanced and sophisticated manner.

''We show that early modern humans at 72,000 years ago, and perhaps as early as 164,000 years ago in coastal South Africa, were using carefully controlled hearths in a complex process to heat stone and change its properties, the process known as heat treatment.''

Previously, the first use of heat treatment was thought to have been in Europe 25,000 years ago. The technique was not believed to have been invented until long after the ancestors of modern humans had left Africa and settled in Europe and Asia.

Scientists had been puzzled by the fine-grained and often reddish coloured silicate blades and axes excavated from prehistoric sites at Pinnacle Point on the South African coast.

If you want to use your mouth then grow some fangs!

3.    FANGS ……………… to be a vampire you have to own teeth that are sharp and can puncher the skin and not remove it by the mouth full.

Now this is what makes getting a refreshing drink both easy and fun.

Types of fang:

There is first what I would call the Hollywood fang, think of hammer house of horror Dracula, two very sharp canine teeth which can only be seen when the lips are pulled up.

These are normally the correct type of fang for the undead vampire and are full explained in my Girls guide to being a vampire. as a paperback and kindle

As long as you do not smile or yawn they can be hidden from sight.

The draw back with these are they are mega sharp so you need to be a fast healer just to heal the damage done to the mouth when talking.

Tall dark silent vampires are the ones that know it hurts to talk as the fangs cut into the lips.

Look even my turned vamps are smart enough to wear plastic caps over the fangs.

Keep the little plastic caps on until you wish to use them or as above you will bite your lips

Plastic Caps to protect the point

This keeps them nice and clean and sharp and can come in clear plastic or dayglow if you wish to make a fashion statement.  

Sometimes you will see a pic of a poor vamp that has a mouth full of razor sharp fangs, now this chap or chap-ess can only drink blood or soup as such teeth make it impossible to chew!

Come on think about it …………… sigh……… look ask a dentist if you do not understand this.

Next we get to the extendable fang: 

This is done by yawning or by a tiger growl, yes yes I know its childish but it works and a lot better than hissing,  I never know how this happens and personally I put it down to shyness as I have placed a mirror in my mouth to what how it works and they refuse to descend when looking.    

Now these are the best sort to have and can give hours of innocent pleasure in cleaning and polishing them.

I use an Ivory polish on a battery tooth brush, it is only right that you should give your victim a nice clean bite so to leave the nice fashionable neck holes.

What people fail to know is this means all living vampires have to have a top over bite to their jaw, now you must know that!

It is a good way to check if someone is a vampire, straight teeth with no overbite means not a vampire as if there were then the extending fangs would mean they could not close their mouths let alone bite anything thicker than a piece of paper.

Come on think about it ……………. 

Unless you have an over bite you will not be able to use your fangs, if you have a under bite then with fangs you will look like a wild pig! there are billions of people that could never be turned into a vampire due to racial characteristics on jaw alignment.

We are talking about vampires and not snakes ……lol

Good for biting but not for chewing and even talking is not easy

As for the drinking of blood this can be done in several ways.

The Undead turned vampire with the cute Hollywood fangs makes 2 puncture holes and get squirted in the eyes until they remember to place lips around the holes ………….. not all vamps are that bright.

Personally being a Living vampire I have the benefit of not being human to start with so my body works slightly different to a humans.

The fangs are very strong and hollow and as soon as they penetrate the neck blood is forced through the fangs by the beating of the victims heart.

You now know why we don’t like dead meat.

Drinking from a living human is better as it is less work and the blood has a fresher taste.

Yes we can also drink it normally and get real messy doing it unless you can carry a nice large bear tankard with you.

Some of my friends take it with coffee but as for me I find mixing it with chocolate syrup is ho so yummy ……..    


I hope this has been helpful and give you something to think about when you see a pic of some vampire showing permanent massive fixed fangs without out pointing out that having them means not only can they not chew but nor speak! 

To understand more about the problems in being a vampire google me:  Amy Mah Vampire or buy one of my vampire books         


Special offer price on VAMPIRE book

Special offer price on VAMPIRE by amy Mah on Kindle


Amazon UK

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This very funny vampire novel is very different from your normal vampire book and not just because it is bursting with full colour art fitted in with the text showing the life of a young vampire forced to walk about in a transparent nightdress all day without underwear because that is what female vampires are supposed to do! 

Unlike the undead sex mad vampire maids, Amy was a living vampire and the main difference apart from having better teeth and a pulse, meant she felt and suffered the cold invasive winds blowing along the corridors, most female vampire called them male winds due to the way they were always trying to rip the nightdresses off them. 

From fighting in skin tight painted on body suits to learning to hang upside down from a ceiling in a nightdress without showing the world what you had for lunch, was just the start of her vampire training program. 

And yes it's normal for a girl to dream about Guys, even if the girl happens to be a blood sucking denizen of the night - - - - It’s just that this denizen wishes the dreams could involve chocolates and holding hands and not leaping out on someone, ripping his shirt off and demanding to know what blood type he is, well at least not on the first date. 

(Amy the vampire:…… 
“The massacre on 22nd and 3rd was greatly exaggerated by the human newspapers and not altogether my fault. It was my very first hunting trip, and a girl should not be judged by her first bite night. And no one ever talks about me saving the life of that cat. Besides, most of them kind of killed themselves without any help from me.”……………. 

“And before tonight it was only one male that I killed by ripping his throat out with my teeth.”…………. 
“And no, I did not then eat him. I don’t normally eat vampires. I think I just chewed and swallowed what I had in my mouth after I bit him. That was all, and it was not that he even tasted that good. Besides, it was only three or four mouthfuls before he threw me off.”) 

Books With Teeth Reviews 

Vampire: By Amy Mah offers exactly what I was looking for in a Vampire novel. She creates a vampire society that lives just out of sight of humans but close enough to get a midnight snack...or take out if they feel like staying home! The story takes place around the life of Amy Mah a typical teenage girl in every way except for instead of painting her nails and worrying about shoes she polishes her Fangs and sharpens her claws both hand and foot! 

That of course does not sound typical at all but for Amy it is. Our teenage Vampire soon finds herself swept up in a world of social intrigue and ancient hierarchy as she enters the hidden world of the Vampires. Adopted by her ""Uncle"" and ""Aunt"" Pinkbat, Amelia becomes one of the clan and quickly finds she needs to grow up fast and catch up on the rules of being a Vampire if she is to survive long in a cut throat society filled with political feuds and clan territorial disputes. Being a Vampire is not as Romantic as Hollywood makes it out to be! 

Amy has a writing style that is refreshing and well thought out. She handles the romance tastefully and you can tell the character is an extension of the author herself. The illustrated version is a real treat because you get to see, obviously, illustrations of the characters done by the talented Heby Sim. This adds a significant value to the book. I suggest that everyone read this book. Give it a try because there will be more coming from this EXTREMELY talented author. 


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