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Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Vampire kisses and hot bodice ripping sex



Vampires and Bodice Ripping
Rampant SEX




Why the title of bodice ripping sex? when all I have to offer is a new black poker dot dress and if you try to rip that off me in a fit of sexual passion then you may well feel in heaven as I will kill you!!

If you were lucky and found my blogs when searching for sex and porn sites …….er lucky and kinda sad …….. look don’t let me tell you how to live your lives

Blog titles I am now being linked to porn sites by stupid nano search spiders that decide that as I have sexy titles then I must be part of the porn industry !!!!!!! Hah !  

Also I am told the word vampire is used a lot in sex sites ….…….. so I have been told ………. Not that I plan to do any research I will leave that to others

My publisher tells me the author of the book :…

……..Vampire Kisses ………….

 Was very surprised at the number of porn sites linking to her book! ….and the reason is the words of the title….vampire kisses is a sex term about drawing blood when having sex….heck …..sex? …

sex……..the only thing I am thinking of when biting someone is that would he mind if I ordered the extra large double choc ice-cream with a choc flack and sprinkles….. for afterwards ……….well blood has a tangy aftertaste…

So if you want lots and lots of sex in a book please buy mine! ………..you won’t find any ………. but I need the sales! ……….and well are you really going to return it to the shop saying you want more sex in a book…    
…er…
…god  ………
…. You will sound so sad!

Please guys think about it………..I am a real full blood vampire ……..er……..that means a different species…..ok………….. yes ……….. I know male vampire are always having sex with human girls but some human guys do it with .....sheep! ……… and they don’t put that on their CV’s

Er…………… I think you humans forget your place at times…………… we do not hate you……….we even have nice names for you……………. Er……….Lunch ………

It is the sex starved undead female vampires you should think of when you see the Hollywood films ……..if you try to impress a real full blood female vampire by dropping your pants you may be upset to find she is not thinking of sex but more thinking of perhaps a bread roll some unions and mustard ………….. think very carefully before you drop your pants as having a mouth full of razor sharp fangs should make you very nervous!

Here are my books ……………. 








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