Monday, July 25, 2011

I have seen you naked !

I have seen you naked !

Yes well before we get onto that I have only ever had two bad reviews on my book and this is the worst one, so just to prove as an author I do not hide bad reviews from you.  I will of course make comments on the review as I am hard to shut up even at the best of times.

The book was fair. It was a little too free with the talk of sex, which isn't something I was really expecting from it. Like, sex being okay on the first date. I might be a prude, or my morals are just different.. but that was pretty off-putting for me. 

Now this must be from someone who has never read my blogs …..and believe me compared to my blog the book is veryyyyyyyyyy mild on the subject of sex, and no it is not just me saying it take a look at this video clip review on the book.

What it says about dating is that unlike human girls are a different species and like normal creatures we can only get pregnant when on heat which happens about once every 10 to 20 years.

Where as with humans rabbits come and take lessons from what they get up to!

So sex is not so important an issue with us apart from the turned undead vampires …………ex humans …….. heck these are the ones you see in vampire movies and jump on the first guy they see after getting turned ………… personally I think a bit sluttish but as long as I don’t have to step over them doing it, then who am I to complain.  

A few lines were repeated occasionally, such as the mention of cats being higher rank than her.

Yes at the start under my status and also I expect under C for cat, plus a drawing of my Tarquin looking soooooooo cute in a jumper my aunt knitted him. No fur so he gets cold poor thing.  

I noticed at least one editorial error. 

Yes at least one and someone else said they found two, which with my spelling is almost a miracle of perfection

It was an all right book, that being the case.. I have read better written fanfiction.

Ok can’t say anything on this as I am not even sure what fanfiction is so looked it up and added the meaning to the end of this blog .............. er no as I am the author and not writting about another authors work it is not fanfiction unless i am a fan of myself?

It's probably something that would get by with sex-crazed teenagers, but I prefer something with a little more substance is all.

Ho yes ! sex crazed teenagers is just who it is aimed at !so I got that bit correct.

As to a little more substance ? from a book with a title of “A Girls Guide to being a Vampire”  ho well all I can say is please read my book it is funny giving the reader lots of the odd rules a vampire as to follow and has some sexual innuendo as it talks about the same stuff teens talk of.  

Now today I have found some funny little video clips talking about guys dicks, and no I do not want any more pics of them.
A Woman's Perspective on Penis Pics

A Woman's Perspective on Penis Size, Part 2

Some folk on Facebook are a little weird one left me a comment that he has seen me naked, er………. Even my cartoonist has at most only seen me in a two piece swimming costume, ho and she did a lovely one of me on a beach which I have had framed.

“I Have Seen You Naked”  Yes this comment was posted by a wanker …………. And he even sent me proof of being a wanker!  Yes you guessed I had yet another pic of a dick sent to me.

What is it with guys and taking photos of their dicks and then posting them to girls they don’t even know …………… perhaps its a new technological age flasher movement. 

It really is a mistake to think sending me a dick pic is a way to pull a girl, not again I thought, just another guy trying to impress me ……er…….. it has a subtext on size! Like if that is 14cm I think he needs to buy a new ruler, either that or he must have hands the size of a gorilla ! 

Like it does not do anything for me apart from prove to me that he is a wanker …………. Heck he just sent me a photo to prove it !………………. so wanker is that it? That is your idea of romance? Send me a dick pic with your hands on it yep you’re a wanker all right.

Look at the film clips, what she says in the film is so true, to impress a girl send her chocolates or at least a copy of your bank balance, in any case all dicks in my company should be looking like a bald headed guy wearing a roll top jumper, if not then the owner must be gay.

To finish off look at what I have found under dicks in Islam ……….Youtube has a lot to answer for ………….

Just how can this be real ……..just listen to what is being said and then tell me if some religious books really don't need to updated.

Wife must comply to husband's sexual desires


Fan fiction meaning from Wickipeadia

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Fan fiction (alternately referred to as fanfiction, fanfic, FF, or fic) is a broadly-defined term for fan labor regarding stories about characters (or simply fictional characters) or settings written by fans of the original work, rather than by the original creator. Works of fan fiction are rarely commissioned or authorized by the original work's owner, creator, or publisher; also, they are almost never professionally published. Because of this, many fanfics written often contain a disclaimer stating that the creator of the fanfic owns none of the characters. Fan fiction, therefore, is defined by being both related to its subject's canonical fictional universe and simultaneously existing outside the canon of that universe.[1] Most fan fiction writers assume that their work is read primarily by other fans, and therefore tend to presume that their readers have knowledge of the canon universe (created by a professional writer) in which their works are based.
Media scholar Henry Jenkins explains the correlation between transmedia storytelling and fan fiction:
The encyclopedic ambitions of transmedia texts often results in what might be seen as gaps or excesses in the unfolding of the story: that is, they introduce potential plots which can not be fully told or extra details which hint at more than can be revealed. Readers, thus, have a strong incentive to continue to elaborate on these story elements, working them over through their speculations, until they take on a life of their own. Fan fiction can be seen as an unauthorized expansion of these media franchises into new directions which reflect the reader's desire to "fill in the gaps" they have discovered in the commercially produced material.[2]

1 comment:

  1. Sometimes I wonder if I read the same book as the person's review I am reading. Sex in your book. Come now, REALLY!!! Teens see more sex with the way some of them dress. Get real, already!